Be A Man...

Another stab at tackling the great unknowns of life, at 5 am in the morning. Haha, bye-bye body clock.

I've always been taught to do the right thing. After a certain point I no longer needed my parents by my side to remind me - every conscious action on my part reflected a sincere desire to simply do what was right.

Most of the time, temptation was kept at bay by the glowing satisfaction of knowing I had made the better choice. For example, I never had problems returning money I had found, I've never cheated in a test, I've never torn a page out of a library book.

But has it occurred to you, that as you grow older it gets harder and harder to do the right thing?

Perhaps it is because the morally right choices are often made at one's expense. And as you mature you realize that no one's there to protect your interests for you - it's often a one man show. If you yourself don't seek what's best for you, who will?

Recently, I discovered that a friend was undergoing punishment for misplacing his belongings. Somehow, it had gotten lost a few months back, and for the life of him he had been unable to locate it. Into thin air, it had gone.

That night, on the spur of the moment, I decided to check my cabinet to see if his belongings were with me. The logical part of me acknowledged the low probability, but there was something at the back of my mind, nagging away at me...

Lo and behold. His items were actually with me.

I will gloss over the pros and cons of confessing. In the end though, after almost 2 sleepless hours in bed, I messaged him and apologized profusely, taking all responsibility for my honest mistake. Fortunately, there was a happy ending. Of sorts.

And tonight, yes, just tonight, I had to make just such another choice.

It was a choice that messed my insides up completely, keeping me awake until now. I will always remember pacing my room, asking myself why should I not be selfish and just do what I wanted. The morally right choice suddenly seemed too exacting, too painful to make.

I almost succumbed. I almost made a choice that I am sure I would be ashamed of in time to come. In the end, as heart-rending as it was, I made the better choice.

The dust's slowly settling. How will things turn out? Will it all be worth it in the end? What if I realize, a few months down the road, that I was much better off just watching out for myself, instead of always having to keep others in mind?

If you haven't been to such a crossroads before in your life, I wish you strength of resolution and clearness of mind. For it is then that you will see, truly, how difficult it is to -

"Be a man, do the right thing."