Accident 2 : The Perspective

Recently, the much-publicised Bloggies Awards have captivated, spellbound and intrigued me for much longer than I expected, when it consumed my life for almost over a minute. I personally think that the moment you start giving out awards for blogs, it's the same thing as organizing Singapore Idol, where the core talent of singing is overshadowed by the pressing demands of showbusiness.

This way, it's the best-designed blog that wins, not the blogs which mean the most. The best blogs (in terms of writing, meaning) often lose out just because they lack something (design, flair, panache), and can you really say you're happy then? Hands up, all those people who saw True Idol Daphne lose just because she lacked luck.

But I digress. One of the winning blogs was in fact by this lady who did nothing but BITCH. I've seen the site. All she does is BITCH, BITCH, and then BITCH some more. I think we need some responsiblity around here, man. Look, every time someone visits your blog, a bit of your mood rubs off. The more suicidal you are, the more depressed you are, the more BITCHY you are, the less your readers benefit in terms of mental wellbeing.

Yet, just to prove my point, let me tell you about my last two days, in a BITCHY way.

It all began with the maid leaving. Leaving under a cloud of pent-up unhappiness and mutual suspicions. We would have managed ok, normally, if everyone (excluding my mum) hadn't developed some degenerate slothiness due to over-reliance on the maid.

Fast forward to my brother. While the house slowly crumbles under an accumulation of dust, unwashed crockery and miscelleanous muck, he is mostly exempted from the house-keeping responsibilities as he is a student, and it's tough balancing practicing guitar, practicing guitar, and practicing guitar. Furthermore, all his leisure time is taken up by practicing guitar, so it's unfair to him if we expect him to upkeep the house too.

But it's no longer ok if you just up and leave for school expecting everyone to wait at home to open the lousy door for you. And that's what happened. After I arranged to meet a friend at 4pm, and was just about to leave the house, my mum tells me that I better rid myself of my degenerate slothiness, and fetch my brother from school. And open the gate for him.

It's pointless arguing how stupid it is to thrash all of one's plans just like that. It would still be ok if my mum and I could contact my brother and at least find out his plans. But noooo.... I think that out of all the brilliant services Starhub offers, like 16 Channel Mosiac Surfing (16CMS) and Conference Calls With A Thousand People Simultaneously (CCWATPS), one of the most important is where you dial an 8 digit number, causing the related phone to ring, and the other person picks up. It's the Receiving A Lousy Normal Call (RALNC) service. But I'm guessing my brother's subscribing to Starhub only for 16CMS and CCWATPS, because he certainly doesn't or cannot RALNC.

By the time the fan can hardly rotate anymore (on account of all the s*it hitting it), my 4pm-friend's become an acquaintance.

The next day, whilst rushing to finish chores for my dad, restore the house to a semblance of serviceability, wake my brother for school, being late to meet aforementioned acquaintance, and still maintaning a cheery disposition so I don't ruin my girlfriend's day, a lousy BMW hits my car.

Ladies and Gentlemen, the night is still young, there's more.

As I panic on account of having an extensive driving experience of 0 year(s) and 1 month(s), as stated in the Accident Report Form, I realize I have no one to call for help. My dad's overseas, my mum's at class, my brother's practicing guitar, my girlfriend's waiting for me to have dinner. I logically then turn to a complete stranger from a car repair workshop for guidance and help, since she obviously has no vested interest in helping me. Right. The same no-vested-interest way farmers would force feed their livestock.

When I finally manage to return the car to a silent home, I find out my girlfriend's family's still waiting for me for dinner. So I rush down, because I'm thinking, hey, my day's been s*itty, but that's no reason for screwing up other peoples' day. Yet, for some reason, maybe because I'm still joking about the whole thing and not removing my hair in clumps, I mislead everyone to think I'm still happy and all inside. And thus, I end up getting rubbed the wrong way entirely. Girlfriend, I really couldn't talk more tonight, I really didn't want to screw your mood.

My dear reader, the end of this fantastic day is nigh. I delude myself by thinking my family will be so concerned over my safety (the accident, remember?) that all will be forgotten and forgiven, at least for one night. But I was wrong, and it's probably my fault, for not coming up with a better reason than I GOT HIT FROM BEHIND. MY CAR WAS STATIONARY. DOES IT LOOK LIKE MY FAULT? My parents ask me how come I didn't handle the entire accident/insurance reporting/claiming better, how come I made an error in the reporting of that silly guy's name. Gee, yeah, I really shouldn't have let the shock and the stress of getting hit on a jammed PIE bother me, huh.

Tomorrow morning I will rectify the Accident Report Form. Then I will meet another friend. Then I will split myself to go for three birthday parties, while keeping in mind that no matter who I honour with my degenerate slothy presence, I will still piss two friends off and make them think I'm anti-social and a Daphne-hater.

Damn, all this bitching and I don't even earn a prize.